August: Sly as a Stallone

Rambo? Rocky who? Pssh. Forget about the “classics” — this month, we’re watching five reasons why Sylvester Stallone received the 2000 “Worst Actor of the Century” Razzie award for “95% of Everything He’s Ever Done.”

August 2: FIELD TRIP! Come out to The Dark Room, 2263 Mission, for a very special screening of Over the Top, Stallone’s epic arm-wrestling drama. Witty banter provided by Tristan Buckner and other hosts. $5. No potluck tonight, just come to the movie. Be there at 8pm sharp!

August 9: F.I.S.T. — “Jimmy Kovak (Sylvester Stallone) is a hardworking 1930s factory employee pursuing the American Dream. When factory conditions push him too far, he pushes back. As he unionizes his co-workers, he’s faced with a grueling uphill battle. But when he aligns himself with the mob, he realizes that he’s sacrificed far more than just his principles.”

August 16: Demolition Man — “In the violent 1990s, a cop (Sylvester Stallone) catches a relentless killer (Wesley Snipes), and both end up in a cryogenic deep freeze. In the peaceful year 2032, the criminal emerges from his long chill and attacks the now crimeless California. Unable to stop the bloodshed, a “Big Brother” boss (Nigel Hawthorne) defrosts the murderer’s past nemesis, who struggles to adapt to the ways of a new world and a restless new partner (Sandra Bullock).”

August 23: Judge Dredd — “Director Danny Cannon’s sci-fi thriller profiles Joseph Dredd (Sylvester Stallone), one of the heavily armed judges who act as jury and executioner when patrolling the streets of a futuristic megalopolis. After Dredd is framed for murder by a power-hungry judge (Jurgen Prochnow), he finds his own pitiless legal system turned against him. Sent to prison with a talkative criminal (Rob Schneider), Dredd quickly escapes to dispense true justice.”

August 30:Death Race 2000 — “In the racing world of the future, it’s no longer a crime to run down a pedestrian with your car. In fact, it’s all part of the game. Speeding across mixed terrain in a transcontinental contest, five daring competitors (including David Carradine and his character’s arch-rival, Sylvester Stallone) go up against a gang of rebels who’d like nothing better than to put a stop to them and their brutal sport. Mary Woronov co-stars.”